


Nothing Last

by Caelum_Sin



Series: Stuck in the middle with you [2]
Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: F/F, Fluff and Smut, Gem Egg Hell, Gem Sex, Hurt/Comfort, Porn With Plot, Tentacle Sex, Tentacles, gem licking and biting, implied demisexual Peridot, sensitive gemstone kink, tentadick, water strap-on
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-10
Updated: 2020-04-10
Packaged: 2021-03-01 16:49:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 21,869
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23580352
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Caelum_Sin/pseuds/Caelum_Sin
Summary: Everything should be absolutely perfect. Lapis has a new life with Peridot in little Homeworld, and they are closer than ever. Yet, the demons from her past come back, and Lapis learns that repressing things was not quite a good idea. Unable to go forward, to really start something with Peridot, her idea of fusion is ruined and needs to be rekindled. The worst though? As much as she hates it . . . she finds herself longing for it anyways.
Relationships: Lapis Lazuli/Peridot (Steven Universe)
Series: Stuck in the middle with you [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1697344
Comments: 11
Kudos: 85





	Nothing Last

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everybody ! 
> 
> You can't imagine how happy I am to finally be able to release this part 2 of Stuck in the Middle with you ! I made all of you wait for nearly 6 months now. Well, obligations and writer block are a pain in the ass. So sorry for this :( 
> 
> But I did all I could do to make this second part as good as possible ! So I hope you'll enjoy it :) 
> 
> All over again, I want to thanks Scarlet_Was_Here, my beta-reader, who worked as much as me to make all of this readable and enjoyable ! She did an amazing job on editing my derpy writing <3 So don't hesitate to check her fics too ! :D
> 
> Also, big thank you for AyokaiW, who supported me during those months, and all the people from the Sinner's Cafe (you will recognize yourself ;) )
> 
> There MIGHT be a part 3 to this, I've some plot idea for it, but considering how much time this second part took me to write, I don't know if it'll be for now. So I don't want to make empty promises. 
> 
> Now, I hope you'll enjoy your reading :) Thank you !
> 
> (Title inspired by the music "Nothing Last" by Bedroom)

“Tell me Biz, have you ever fused?”

The question was unexpected, clearly surprising Bismuth. She stared at the gem. The gem in question didn’t look at her, her expression a blank slate, her gaze stuck to an imaginary point somewhere to the right of Bismuth.

They were alone, Lapis deciding to lend a hand to Bismuth fixing a small project, partially destroyed when two gems had a little disagreement. Peridot was with the two troublemakers in question, trying to smooth out the sharp edges and basically give them the time out corner before they can come back into town. She became kind of an expert about that kind of things. The great diplomacy in human form. She was the most reliable gem in little Homeworld. Gems could count on her. So Lapis tried her best to support everything else with Bismuth whenever she could.

However--now--she was lost, and the question that’s eaten away at her head has finally escaped. It had been some time since she wanted to ask this to her friend. Bismuth was as old as her, and she had been a crystal gem, living on Earth, for a long time now. Certainly she must have tried fusion at least once. She had to. Bismuth was the only person she could even think to ask at this point.

Well, she had been tempted to ask the question to Garnet before, but she knew that the perma-fusion was sometimes a . . . little bit too much enthusiastic about fusions. Especially when they’re formed by two gems who share a very deep connection. Garnet would accidently make her feel pressured. Way too much pushing, and she just wasn’t exactly ready for such. 

Talking with Amethyst was out of the question. She wouldn’t be able to keep it to herself, no matter how much Lapis begged her to stay quiet. And she didn’t share the greatest friendship with Pearl. 

No. Bismuth was perfect for this. They were pretty close, and the Crystal Gem knew what happened with Malachite. Bismuth had lived some hard experiences herself due to the war, and it still hung over her head sometimes. So she would understand the turmoil in Lapis’ head. She trusted Bismuth. A difficult idea sometimes to give such, but it felt right with her.

Still, the blacksmith seemed a bit caught off guard. Definitely overwhelmed by it. After all, she knew fusion was kind of a sore topic for the blue gem. And she wasn’t the greatest gem with managing this sort of things. Sometimes failing to give proper advice, or too quick in thinking ahead of what might fall from her mouth as she sputters a response. But her efforts were sweet either way. 

“Well, uh . . . yeah. I often fused with Crazy Lace or Biggs during, um, the war. Why . . . ?” 

Lapis seemed deep in thought, not responding right away. Instead she shot her next inquiry, lifting some heavy wood planks with her hydropower. She clearly tried to busy herself, work with her hands like Peridot has told her to; to not be overwhelmed by fears and doubts that might nip and make her itch.

“How does it feel, Biz. . . ? I mean, you guys just seem so close. And fusing--even if it was just meant for a mission or something--it shouldn’t have been bad. . . . Right?”

Bismuth continued to work on reinforcing the foundations, taking the wooden planks that Lapis gave her and nailing them to the wall, losing herself in the physical labor, trying to keep things light and casual for her poor friend. She stopped hammering to respond, thoughtful, trying to find what could be the best thing to say.

“It never was unpleasant. I mean, you sure do feel stronger. You are stronger. But that never was the most important thing when we fought. Let’s say, even if you’re not really yourself anymore, even if you’re just . . . a new gem, you still share everything with your partner. Your thoughts, your feelings, and your deepest desires and fears. Nothing equals the burning need to fight for what’s right when its shared by your partner and yourself. It creates something huge. Something bigger than just the fusion. It’s beautiful and powerful.

You can practically feel the link that connects both of you, as if it were a physical tie between the both of you. Well I guess it technically is. I mean--” she huffs, seemingly embarrassed-- “you know what I mean! It’s just . . . nice.”

It seemed perfect by how she describes it. By someone who has never had to suffer through a toxic fusion--a forced fusion.

Lapis really wished that her first fusion would have been like that. Things would have been easier. She knew perfectly well that, if gems shared deep trust and feelings, there was nothing to be afraid of. She knew that Malachite would never come back again if she doesn't allow it. Peridot--and her especially--will never let it happen. 

Still, an unpleasant shudder shakes her body. She remembered it; sharing everything with Jasper, trying to get her out of her head, driving her crazy, violent and twisted. She was so afraid of herself. She was so messed up. Lapis couldn’t never fuse with Peridot, if she shared everything that was inside of her tortured mind. Peridot would see inside the monster she has swallowed so long ago. She would hurt the innocent gem. 

Yes, she has healed. Slowly, steadily, yes she does feel better. But it still lurks in her palms. In her very creation. It lives as long as she lives.

“I can’t fuse,” she states. Rip it off like a bandaid. Just get it all out of the way. “Not anymore. You have to share everything with the other gem, right? There’s just too much in my head. I don’t want to be a burden. I just can’t be again. I don’t want to hurt someone I care about. I hurt Jasper when we were Malachite. She hurt me. It was a vicious cycle on both sides. It might just be doomed to happen again if I fuse with someone else . . . I’m too messed up for fusion, Biz.”

Sharing such things with Bismuth was easy. She knew that the bulky gem was able to put up with everything. No judgment, no panicking and especially no pitying. She was a good listener, always having an external perspective on everything. Even if the blacksmith was sometimes too raw and blunt without realizing it, Lapis was glad that she was her friend. 

Bismuth stopped what she was doing, shooting a glance at Lapis, her forehead creased in worry. She just put her hand on the Lapis’ shoulder, her palm as big as her head. She offers a gentle smile.

“You’re doing so much better Lapis, you know? We all see it. Stop worrying about what happened. You’ll never be able to do anything about it. The past is the past. I honestly would offer my help, if you wanted to try to fuse I mean. But something tells me this fuss is because you want to do it with Tiny. Is my assumption correct?”

The smile on Bismuth face got wider, especially when she saw the aristocratic gem cheeks flushed with a royal blue at the insinuation.

“Wha . . . ! No !” she stammered, taken aback by how the tables have turned on her. There was no use to deny it. 

The blacksmith was no fool. She understood the reason behind all the sudden interrogation. Yes, she wanted to try to fuse with her small mate. Someday at least. But she wasn’t prepared to talk about that right now! And she didn’t even know if Peridot wanted to fuse with her anyways. Who would even want to fuse with her?

A powerful smack on her back made her stumble, waking her from her stupor. Her burly friend gives a hearty laugh.

“Come on, she’s your mate. A small fusion is nothing compared to this! It’s normal to want it. Don’t worry so much. You two are perfect for each other. And I’m certain that Peridot is dying to try it out with you. In the worst case possible, you may not like fusing, so you don’t ever try it again with Peridot or any gem. But, hey, that’s fine. You know how accepting Peridot is anyways. And you will still able to, you know…” she teases, playfully cuffing Lapis over the head gently. Even her cheeks took a tiny tint. Being smug about this kind of thing wasn’t usually her thing. She must feel a bit of embarrassment that she’s acting as such. Even if it was just to mess with her bud. 

And contrary to the small flush on her grey cheeks, Lapis was furiously blushing and glaring daggers. It was always something that made her shy and curl into herself like a timid kitten. Be damned, every gem living at Little Homeworld knew about her private life with Peridot now. Her mate being too innocent to understand that certain details were meant to be private.

They were closer than ever now after Lapis’ sudden spike of heat, and she couldn’t ever imagine being able to regret that night they shared. Yet she hated herself for imposing herself onto the gem she loved like she did. She had the lingering impression that she forced Peridot. Tainting her mate. That’s why, after that night, she never tried to do anything with her mate again. Even if it was so frustrating. She refused to pressure the poor gem to do any kind of obscenities with her again. As pleasurable as it was the first time.

Fusing and mating was out of question, despite their shared fondness for each other. But the big crystal couldn’t know about this. It didn’t stop Lapis dropping the wooden planks on Bismuth’s feet. It earned her some colorful curses from Bismuth as she jumped back, kneading her aching wounds. She looked at Lapis with a confused face once the pain vanished. Not understanding why the aristocratic gem would do something like that out of nowhere. Realizing that she hurt her friend when she was only trying to help, she tenses and sucks in a breath. Even if she was just teasing something Lapis was sensitive about, Bismuth didn’t deserve that. Quite on the contrary. She hated when she acted out on sudden surges of emotions at the smallest contrariety sometimes. 

“S-Sorry! I’m really sorry! I . . . I just . . . can we please, you know just--not talk about this again, please?”

She soon made the wooden planks float in the air again thanks to her hydrokinesis, ducking her head down. How does anyone put up with her sometimes? Although, despite everything, they were here. Bismuth even excused herself for making Lapis feel embarrassed. She had no reason to apologize like this. She did it anyways. No other words were shared and quietly, they started to work again on the small house.

Lapis mumbled a small “thank you, Biz” then though which made the burly blacksmith smile widely, the silence becoming a bit lighter and more bearable.

Some time later, when all the repairs were nearly done, they heard a familiar nasally voice calling them. Peridot came towards them with a proud grin chest puffed up with promise as Snowflake and Larimar followed her, chatting cheerfully.

“Mission accomplished! As I say, no problems can’t be resolved without some talking through! Just like Steven would!” Peridot stated.

The statement made Lapis falter a bit. Was it true? Does all her fear and problems would be gone if she just talked to Peridot? Maybe. Probably. And still, she found herself unable to talk about this to the younger gem, fearful to upset her or pressure her again. Yet someday, she would have to.

She knew that.

It isn't healthy to stay like this with her fateful mate. But she would do it on her own accord, when she feels ready to. She forced her lips up into a matching smile, her hand ruffling Peridot’s hair affectionately. 

“I’m proud of you, you’re truly the best counselor of Little Homeworld,” Lapis says, flattering her small mate’s ego. Her heart melted when she saw the pleased look that Peridot sent her. She reminded her of a spoiled cat. 

“That’s right! I never thought that talking about all of this would make it so much easier. Thank you again, Peridot,” Snowflake added, looking at her smaller blue friend, clearly happy that they made up. “And thank you Bismuth, Lapis, for patching up our house! Sorry again for the trouble. . . .”

It was really unimaginable that a few hours ago, the two gems were nearly ready to shatter each other over a simple disagreement about their housing. Also something about ice. They preferred to not call Steven for this as he was so busy nowadays, and it wasn’t something they couldn’t overcome together.

“No wonder why you get along so well. You make a good team. I hope we’ll be like you three later with Snow,” beamed little Larimar, her arms flying around the thick leg of her friend. The gem bends over her to lift her up, situating Larimar up on her shoulder.

It was rather cute. However Lapis and Peridot couldn’t help but laugh a bit, looking at each other with shared amusement.

“It wasn’t always like this you know? We had so many arguments before! And even now! It’s normal, you know, it just happens sometimes. But the most important thing is to listen and try to understand each other,” Peridot clarified, taking as she called her “teacher-mode.” But she still tied her hand with Lapis, making the heart of the taller gem bubble like shaken soda.

“I couldn’t tolerate her around me at the beginning, but we worked it through. And it was for the best,” Lapis chuckled, tightening her grip on Peridot. Before a big muscular arm came around her shoulders and Peridot shoulders.

“Well even now, believe me, you don’t want to be around them when they fight. They’re scary,” Bismuth jokes. Even if it was painfully true. She had been around them a bit too much when they had a disagreement. And the two of them teaming against her when she tried to reason with them were really able to scare a soldier like her.

They all shared a laugh. At least, everything was fine now. Or that they thought. Larimar, still perched on her friend's shoulder, bends over, looking at the pair of mates with an expression full of admiration and curiosity.

“Tell me Lapis, Peridot. I wonder why we never saw you two fuse together? I mean, you two are so close--you’re mates--a lot of us thought you would become a perma-fusion at this rate. You don’t have to be shy, we’d all love to meet the fusion of yours!” Larimar declared.

Bismuth (clearly knowing the struggle about all of this) let go of her friends, looking at them, a dumb “oh” being the only thing leaving her mouth.

The other two just froze, glaring, stunned, at the duo in front of them, who just patiently waited for a response. Finally, they let go of each other’s hand as if it were seering, a deep blush invading their respective cheeks in royal blue and turquoise. 

Finally Peridot was the one who decided to speak, trying to clarify the situation. Even if it was easy to catch the panic in her voice.

“No, no! I, we, uh, we don’t want to fuse! You see, hm, let’s say fusions aren’t necessary! Like, uh, yeah. Like, we know we like each other, but we don’t need a fusion to prove it! Not everybody is like Garnet, CrazyLace. Rhodonite or Fluorite, you know? Yes, that’s exactly it. We don’t need to fuse. We don’t want to fuse. We’re perfectly fine like this! Pssh, we’re already mates! Fusions are nothing compared to us.” She waves her hand though. “Don’t misinterpret me. Fusions are fine! They’re good! But we won’t fuse anyways; it’s not for us. Because you see. . . .” Peridot trailed off, still rambling, clearly proving that the only thought of fusion was making her uncomfortable, and she often did some side glances to check on her mate.

That’s exactly why Lapis couldn’t ask her to fuse.

She knew Peridot wasn’t ready, and maybe will never be ready to try. They both had difficulties with fusion, and that was fine. As Peridot said, they didn’t need it. She knew she loved her mate and the other way around is true too. 

Still, it pained her deeply because she knew, she was dying to try it with the gem who was the most important for her. Even if it was a bad idea, she wanted to know what it would feel like to fuse. To feel Peridot’s love; raw and pure. She was just afraid of hurting Peridot. She wouldn’t be able take it if she hurt her. Well, the decision was made even before the question was enounced. She had her response.

Some color left her face, and she falls into silence, itching for a chance to just leave this behind already. Peridot interpreted her reaction then, thinking it was about her past. Lapis couldn’t help herself but resent the two gems a bit, who dared to just up and question them like this. She didn’t need this right now. She wasn’t ready to talk about this with anyone else.

Fortunately, Bismuth who knew the situation, made a diversion and left with the two curious gems before they could ask more protruding questions to her friends. Giving them a thumbs up, she mouthed a “talk to her” to Lapis before leaving the house. However, Lapis was still silent, dejected. Like a programmed robot, she just put herself back at work, starting on the last fixing of the house.

Peridot tensed, worried about Lapis once more. Coming closer, she gently put a small hand on her back, just above the teardrop-shaped gemstone. She wanted to catch her mate’s attention without scaring her. It was the equivalent of approaching frightened prey.

“Lapis? Are you okay? You can talk to me. I’m sorry about all of that. I know how you don’t like to talk about . . . fusion. But as I said, we don’t have to. . . .” Peridot stopped when she felt lips gently kissing her gem, making her tongue turn to stone, and her face feel warm. Lapis offered a smile even though it obviously didn’t reach her eyes.

“No, you’re right, we aren’t made to fuse. We don’t need it. I already know how much you love me. You show it to me everyday,” Lapis murmured.

Still, despite what Lapis said, she knew that something was making the other gem feel bad. However, she knew Lapis well enough to know when she had to insist and when she had to let her process everything before she would talk. It was clearly the latter, otherwise Lapis would be still mulling over the subject, and wouldn’t try to reassure her like this. So she let some space to her partner, just helping her out with the repairs. 

They had all the time in the world to understand; to heal and to talk. As they said, they didn’t need fusion. They were happy together, and that was the most important thing. And never, never would Lapis force herself or anyone to relive that traumatic experience. Even if she knew that their fusion--if it does happen--would be the happiest fusion out there, and completely different from Malachite, both didn’t have to stay together permanently like Garnet. Plus, it wasn’t like Era 2 Peridots weren’t able to fuse. Right? 

There were so many things she didn’t know about herself, things that the Diamonds had hidden from her that she wasn’t so sure anymore. Still, she would never fuse if Lapis decided not to. She couldn’t even imagine fusing with other gems. Both of them had made that decision when they developed strong feelings for one another. Even without really knowing about it.

Here on earth, she had learned that fusion was sacred to a lot of gems. A piece of who they really are. Something big and full of joy. Or absolutely miserable if it’s not with the right gem at the right time. Lapis was the only one she trusted enough for something like this. Lapis was the only one. And would always be.

Once they cleared out the little house. Good as new, Peridot went to her mate to take her hand in hers and offered her an encouraging smile. Maybe she didn’t know what was bothering Lapis, but it didn’t mean that she wasn’t able to support her. And seeing the reaction of her mate, she knew it was the right thing. Lapis grip tightens on her hand and a warm smile stretched her lips, her posture now relaxed.

However, it didn’t stay that way. When the two gems left the house, a voice greeted them. Lapis visibly tensed at this. Forcing a smile onto their lips, they waved at the overly joyous face of the freckled Lapis Lazuli.

It’s been two weeks since Zuli joined Little Homeschool, leaving her sister, Laz, behind. Lapis had been pretty happy in the first place that the previous terraformer changed her mind and now was self improving. But she wasn’t able to forgive her that easily. The Crystal Gem was still pretty angry at her new student for what happened before she moved onto the planet. She had to stay professional though. She was her teacher after all. It would only be fair.

She knew that Zuli was so friendly with her because she feared her and admired her power. Yes, they had the upper hand on their first fight that fateful night, but it was only because Lapis’ heat disturbed her. Without her mind blurred by the overwhelming need to mate, these two sisters couldn’t do anything against her. Not when she had been trapped in a mirror for nearly 6,000 years, forcing her to forge a mind of steel to not become insane. Not when she had to learn how to control all the ocean with her gem cracked to get back on Homeworld. Not when she trapped one of the strongest Quartz which came out from a Kindergarten into a fusion, fighting with her every single second for months. Not when she had to fight against the diamonds to protect her home and her friends, overcoming all her fear about another gem war. So, even if her former teammates were as old as her, they hadn’t been through all of these things which forced her to be this powerful.

They didn’t have her past. 

But that was for the better, right? It wasn’t their fault that they were like this. They didn’t need to be tortured just to learn something. To learn to be wiser and have patience with not themselves, but with others.

And she had all the rights to be wary about Zuli. But Steven was right about leaving a second chance to every gem. She wouldn’t be here otherwise. That’s why she tried. Oh Diamonds, yes she tried. And it was so difficult to believe that the freckled gem didn’t plan something shady behind her back. Zuli was always so . . . overly happy and positive, and she’s made so much progress in only two weeks. She accepted every new thing from the earth. It reminded her of Navy. She was right then about her intentions, what if she was right now?

Also, the way she looked at Peridot--her Peridot--didn’t ease her nerves at all. She has to be honest: that was the real problem. So when Zuli eyes just switch from her to Peridot, Lapis couldn’t help herself and came closer to her mate in a protective manner, laying her hand against her back. Yet, the two other gems didn’t really notice the switch in Lapis’ attitude.

The freckled gem just smiled--so much teeth showing--her arms linked behind her back, her voice nearly squeaking when she chirped.

“Lapis! Peridot! Hey! Are you okay? I heard about Larimar and Snowflakes, and wanted to know if everything is alright?” she asked, a hint of concern in her voice, coming a bit closer to them, blind to Lapis’ protective stance.

“Yes, yes, everything is back to normal, Lapis and Bismuth fixed the house, and I managed to make them talk to each other,” Peridot explained, still with a forced smile. She was near gritting her teeth.

Even if Zuli did make efforts to become a “good gem” and adapting to earth’s ways, the smaller gem couldn’t really feel at ease with her student either. Especially not when this one tried to flirt with her at every occasion. “Flirting.” She wasn’t familiar with the action, but it’s what everybody said to her when they see how Zuli acted towards her. And she knew it was bad, because she wanted this kind of attention only from Lapis--her Lapis. Not any other. And despite her giving the cold shoulder to her student, this one continued to shower her with unrequited and baseless compliments. Amethyst often joked about how she was a “Lapis Lazuli magnet” when she happened to complain about it. She didn’t like it. Not one bit. So, talking to Zuli always made her nervous as she tried to keep herself strictly professional.

“Oh right! Awesome! I wanted to come to help, but I know I’m not as great as Peridot for helping other gems! You are truly the best at what you do, professor !” Zuli beamed as she came closer to the smaller gem, a hand lingering over her arm.

The gesture made the hairs on Lapis’ neck stand up, but she said nothing. She just bit the inside of her cheek, trying to restrain herself. Zuli was only friendly, or at least, it’s what she tried to repeat to herself to not create a scene for potentially nothing.

And usually, upon hearing this, Peridot would be proud, puffing her chest out in pride, claiming that “of course I’m was good at this! I’m the best gem around there!” But here . . . she just let out a nervous laugh. She tensed under the small touches. It reminded her way too much of that night where they cornered Lapis while she was in heat. Yet, Zuli seemed to refuse to read the atmosphere, or she just didn’t care at all. Imposing herself was sometimes what she did best. She gripped Peridot’s hands in hers, a pleading look appearing on her always smiling face, offering the best puppy eyes she could to the era 2 gem.

“I’ve thought about something. Since you’re so great with stuff like this, would it be possible for you to become my only teacher? I mean, I don’t need all those other lessons, especially not the “meep morps” ones,” she shrugs, near spitting the word out, “and I clearly have surpassed my teacher in this domain already! Don’t you think so?” she questions. Her eyes never leaving Peridot’s.

And despite the innocent act she was putting on, Lapis knew that it was a jab at her. She was the meep morp teacher. It was her profession showing her students how to express their feelings through different artistic usages; sculpting, drawing, dancing or singing. There was something for everyone. She knew perfectly well how meep morps could be an outlet for many. As it obviously was for her. And without the judging eyes of Laz, it’s true that Zuli was expressing herself freely and beautifully. Especially with dance. She was as fluid as water when she wanted to join. Still, saying that she was better than Lapis. To put herself on a pedestal . . . she knew that the little shit just wanted to mess with her. 

She tensed, glaring daggers, unconsciously responding to the thinly veiled insult.

Yet, she didn’t have time to say anything to defend herself as Peridot yanked her hands away, looking clearly displeased by what their student said. Peridot was retraining a scorned expression. She just forced herself to talk calmly, not looking at Zuli.

“All the lessons taught here--each by different teachers--are needed to acquire knowledge about the earth and acclimate yourself to this planet. The expected results are supposed to be making all the gems here find their self-worth and live in harmony with humans. We work hard to organize a structured and well-balanced program. So believe me when I say that you need all your teachers.” She never missed a beat. When she finished, she gave Zuli a look, a small twitch to her lip, clearly displeased. She wasn’t done though.

“Also, as someone who dabbles in meep morps, I can assure you that Lapis knows her stuff. We both have years of training and we often collaborate together even. She's completely certified. And you still have a lot to learn if you really think that your morps are even greater than hers. Granted it’s nice to be proud of your work but every good meep morper knows that there’s always something more to learn and improve on. Isn’t that right, Lapis?” Peridot looked towards her mate, genuinely smiling now, her arms crossed in front of her chest. After all they were the ones who invented meep morping for gems!

A small flush appeared on Lapis’ cheeks. She was happy that her mate took to her defense like this. Even if she was certain that Peridot was kind of oblivious to the evident flirting. It wasn’t her fault. She wasn’t good with this kind of thing. Even Lapis wasn’t sometimes. After this, she had to really talk to this annoying snotty gem to make her back off. She just hoped that it wouldn’t end with a fight--again. What would Steven say if she fought with a student ?

Diamonds, she really didn’t want to disappoint him. Not now of all times.

So she just grinned, satisfied, pulling Peridot against her. She looked right at Zuli, silently boasting; “See? She’s mine.” 

A nearly inaudible “tsk” came from Zuli, an irritated expression darkening her features for a second as she stared Lapis down. But it quickly switched when she looked back to the smaller gem, her features softening, pushing another smile on.

“Okay, okay, I understand. You’re right, as always! But I still think you’re the smartest gem around here. You are a Peridot after all. So, maybe, you could give me some,” she gestures vaguely, “you know? Private lessons. Just you and me. I literally crave to learn more, and I really need my preferred teacher for this,” she says. With an angelic tone at first, but fizzled into something low and sultry. 

Zuli bends a bit forward, letting the gem have a nice view of her cleavage. It didn’t get the intended reaction. Peridot looked rather distressed from the unsolicited advances. Peridot wanted to refuse, but her mouth couldn’t move, her tongue like formed concrete. Just when Zuli cupped her cheek. Peridot quickly stepped back, gripping her mate’s pants in panic. It didn’t discourage Zuli at all somehow. On the contrary, her smile just widened. She felt as if she cornered her prey. 

“Oh, don’t be shy. I just want to learn more about the customs of earth, and how to get along with other gems. How to get closer to them even,” she murmurs.

Lapis had enough. She shoves her away, squaring her shoulders. She has her limits, and this was going over every single line she’s drawn. She might disappoint Steven again, but Zuli would have to step over her shattered gem if she wanted to touch her mate like that again. 

She yanks Peridot behind her, snarling at the other Lapis Lazuli. Still, it only made the gem laugh heartily, like this was a joke between friends. Her smile drove Lapis crazy. She was near losing it. 

Her honeyed voice made itself heard again. “You’re so possessive, Lapis! Don’t be jealous if you really want it too. I’m not against having you both as my teachers. If it makes Peridot happy, let it be a three way lesson. . . . Actually, that would be really interesting. Don’t you think so?” She’s near purring, a glint of mischief in her eyes, her pose open and inviting. Despite her choice of words, the tone of her voice left no doubts of the innuendos.

Even Peridot was able to catch it this time and her cheeks flushed in a bright turquoise color. She pushes herself closer against her mate, concerned eyes searching to meet with her mate’s. She was able to feel the tension between the two and the pure anger radiating from Lapis. She was afraid it would break out into another fight; the dark look on Lapis's face, her jaw clenching, teeth grinding together like she was trying to break ice between them. She took a step towards the Zuli, putting Peridot to stay behind her. 

“Don’t you dare,” Lapis growled, gruff and rather animalistic. She really hoped that her demonstration from last time would be enough to scare off the other gem.

Zuli harrumphs, and strides towards her, hands up. Lapis thought she was finally surrendering until she latched onto her arm, pressing her chest against it, a playful glimpse of defiance in her eyes. Diamonds, it was like she was getting off on this.

“Or what? You’ll fall into heat again? Are you sure you don’t want extra help? You’re just so horny, Lapis,” she crones, caressing languidly Lapis’ exposed stomach, practically finger painting with her body.

Lapis shivers in disgust.

“That’s it!” Lapis roars a voice of thunder erupting from her chest. “Get your hands off of me!” 

She storms the ocean gem, yanking her arm away, forming two water hands in the process from her gem. She lost her composure. Once again. She knew that. She wasn’t proud of it, but it seemed that despite all her efforts, Zuli wouldn’t listen unless forced. She knew it. She was like this back then, too. Before being broken. Before all of the hard times were thrown her way. 

But it was way too late to try to better herself right now. This vile snake knew how to push her buttons and just had to use that to her advantage any chance she got. It would be the heat incident all over again. 

After all, it was too easy for Zuli to play with Lapis’ emotions. She knew that making her jealous would provoke her heat again. At least, a marking heat. One where gems needed to mark their mate--or to be marked by them--to reaffirm the link there was between the two partners. Generally happening due to strong emotions; jealousy and possessivity; love burning sky high; frustration to not be able to express pent up emotions up front. Usually, it was gone just after the burning need was satisfied, and soon forgotten. 

It was still annoying. She hated herself for falling for it, but at least it wasn’t a breeding heat. The worst kind. It was always incessant, making the physical form beg for procreation each hour of the day. Every minute and every second. Making gems unable to do anything else. She knew that one day, she would have to deal with it. After all, now she had a mate, someone she cared about. Even if she knew that they wouldn’t be able to have geodes with Peridot, her body wouldn’t know and wouldn’t even listen. But it was a problem for another time. She hoped at least, because marking heat could push a gem into a breeding one. That’s why she fought all she could to restrain the burning hate in her chest, blooming due to her possessiveness.

Either way, she refused to have Zuli steal Peridot away.

That’s why she had to strike before it would happen. Becoming aggressive like this was weakness, she realized, but she outright refused to be unable to take action and hurt Peridot again due to some stupid heat, caused by her almost tangible emotions. Her water hands started to get bigger and bigger, hovering over Zuli, threatening to shatter her with a simple strike. Lapis was trembling over the rage, and she smirked when she saw fear quickly paint over the other gem’s freckled face. She was ready to tell her to back off, not to ever try again or feel her wrath until she felt warmth grasp her by the waist.

“Lapis, stop! She isn’t worth it! You have to show an example--be the example--she’s one of our students!” Peridot pleaded. She didn’t want Little Homeworld to be affected by a fight or have Lapis get in trouble. She didn’t want Lapis to have any harm brought onto her. 

However, she wasn’t able to restrain herself on commenting, “Even if I must admit that she’s pretty annoying with this ‘flirting.’” She was bitter, and she knew she sounded like that. But she couldn’t bring herself to care right then. She offers a small peck on Lapis’ gem, and her mate shudders before sighing, her posture already melting into hers. 

Zuli was able to breathe again and mopped away the sweat on her forehead. Her smirk appeared again.

They tensed suddenly when they heard another voice join the party.

“Woah, what?! Is that the mean Lapis? Again?” Amethyst exclaimed. Standing in front of the mates, summoning her whip with a quick flash. Anyone who messed with her friends messed with her.

Zuli just put her hands up in front of her, a pout on her face.

“Awe, Amethyst, I can take annoying but mean? That’s too much! You could be a more considerate professor,” she whined, arms crossed.

Realizing her mistake, a small blush formed on her purple cheeks. Her whip quickly disappeared, laughing, rather abashed.

“Oooh, sorry dude. I thought you were the mean Lapis we fought with this morning. That annoying and snobbish Lapis Lazuli, seemed to know you by the way.” She perked up a bit, rubbing her neck. “Yeah, I just remembered! You’re the new Lapis Lazuli student.”

“No problems, Laz and I are nothing alike though. You know, curly hair and haughty behavior is all her. She’s my… sister ? I guess we can say that. And she doesn’t took well that I left her to go to Little Homeschool.” Zuli smiled innocently, as if nothing happened just before Amethyst’s arrival, trying to reassure the crystal gem.

Lapis finally dropped her fighting stance, but watched the exchange carefully. If she understood correctly, the Crystal Gems had fought against Laz . . . and nobody warned her? Why? She clearly didn’t like to be separated like this. She was certain that Steven was the one who asked them to not warn Lapis about it. After what she said to him about Laz and Zuli, of course he would want to protect her. But she hated it. She hated when people acted as if she was a piece of fragile glass. Now she would have to coax every piece of information out of Amethyst afterwards. Lucky her, it was usually pretty simple to do this with the Quartz.

Then Peridot lets Lapis go, laughing heartily at Amethyst’s mistake. Even if she knew it was just her jumping on the opportunity to release some of the build up tension a few minutes ago. A simple way for her to defuse the situation. Peridot just patted Amethyst’s shoulder.

“Amethyst, how can you identify all your Famethyst pals, but not two really different Lapis Lazulis from each other? Seriously. You’re a hopeless case.” She was joking, but was also seriously asking a question. How was she able to remember and distinct the dozen of Amethysts from her kindergarten when they were all so similar? It must have been a Quartz’s thing, because even she had difficulties with the other Peridots who worked with her back then on Homeworld. 

“Hey! Leave me alone, it’s not my fault! I’ve seen this ‘Laz’ for only two seconds. She was fused with Jasper and we had to fight this Malachite 2.0! We had to break them apart. She flew away afterwards though! Let me tell you, this fusion was even more monstrous than the original! They were so enraged and fucked up together. It was horrifying to see. You can’t even begin to imagine! It was. . . .” she trailed off, only now recognizing the dead silence around her.

It’s only when she met Peridot’s death glare that she lost her grin and tensed. It took her a second to understand. Slowly, she looked up at Lapis, concerned.

She was met by a blank expression. A terrible sign. The calm before the storm. Still, she had to make up for the error somehow. She knew that Jasper was a sensitive subject, but Malachite and the fusion was even worse. Everything mixed up like this was a bomb she just dropped without thinking.

The bomb was now ticking.

Lapis stayed silent for a while, looking at a point on the horizon past the shape of her friends surrounding her. She was overwhelmed by the weight of the shock and fear that was taking over. Glimpses of a past she wanted desperately to forget; that she tried to repress for so long. Now coming for her, waves after waves. Leaving her shivering, gasping for breath with the feeling that she was drowning. Just like when she was trapped with Jasper at the bottom of the sea. . . .

Even if she didn’t need oxygen, she was suffocating, head spinning. Her mind is running. Unsolicited thoughts crashing against each other, making her nauseous. Too much, and too fast; questions; fears were piling up. Jasper was still at it, Jasper still tried to get Malachite back. Jasper hasn’t forgotten her, or moved past what happened like she could. Or at least has tried to. 

Another Lapis Lazuli had to suffer to live in that manner. It hadn't worked, she flew away, and she knew why: Malachite was toxic. Twisted. She was the only one able to keep a leash on the beast. She was glad that Laz was able to escape and leave Jasper behind, but in what conditions? Even if she hated the terraformer with all her being, she couldn’t wish for another gem to live with what she lived with. The experience still torments her years after. She remembered how it felt when she finally broke out of the fusion. The sweet feeling of freedom, but a maddening emotion of being broken. Of wanting more anyways because she missed the beast. It was a certain dark familiarity, a certain routine. It was missing a tooth and then dragging your tongue over the hole, realizing something wasn’t quite right.

Jasper wanted this beast back, and she would go after her again because it hadn’t worked with Laz. The Quartz tasted the sweet power of the fusion again and will want more. That was for certain. Lapis refused to live that all over again. Even if--deep down-- there was a long forgotten voice that ached to be heard again. She wanted a taste of what fusion felt like again. Jasper would never fear to hurt her. Jasper was able to put up with her. She then wouldn’t have to hurt Peridot. Not now, and not ever. 

But the simple thought of abandoning her mate just to fuse with any other gem broke her heart. A terror so powerful made her shiver. She felt her eyes water. She wanted the voice to stop. Just to leave her alone. She couldn’t trust the voice because it was a part of her. And yet. . . .

Lapis jumped, snapping back from her torpor, when she felt a feather-like touch on her arm. Her eyes now focused onto Peridot, who stared at her with an alarmed expression. The expression in the green gem eyes was so tortured, so worried that it made Lapis tense. She couldn’t bear to see this on her sweet face, and she hated herself even more to cause anguish like this. Then, she looked around her, clearly distressed, and noticed that everyone around her stared right back at her with some concern. 

It made her sick. 

She wanted to be left alone, she just needed to let her old wounds fester and eat her heart out. She hated emotions. She preferred to feel nothing than to feel so bad and nauseous. She was ready to explode. She needed to escape. She couldn’t be here and risk hurting her friends or let them see her like this. Not even her mate--Diamonds, especially not her mate. Then Amethyst’s raspy voice broke down the deafening silence.

“H-Hey Lapis, look . . . you won’t see Jasper again, I promise. And this Laz seemed fine when she left. Everyone is okay . . . no problems here, right?” There’s a dry chuckle, but her smile doesn't look complete. It was tight, and painful to look at.

Her friend wasn’t reaching her. It was just a distant whisper, barely heard through the buzzing in her head. No, the voice screaming for her to run and hide, tore inside and wormed its way home. The blue gem started to shiver noticeably, forcing Peridot to take a better grip on her arm, trying to ground her partner with a calming voice, calling her. Nearly begging her to respond. It didn’t work. Lapis just looked at her, terror still painted on her face. She was like cornered prey. She was alarmed. She felt trapped, with all those eyes on her, expecting something from her--either to see her break down or calm down--she wasn’t sure. But it was already too much pressure. 

Without thinking twice, she sprouted her wings, and took off.

It was a bad habit from Lapis Lazuli gems to fly away like this--so quickly--like frightened birds; disappearing just in a second. Always leaving people wondering where they would go. In this particular situation, worry was eating Peridot away. She knew where Lapis was going usually when she felt bad, but what if she was so afraid that she decided to leave earth? And what if she decided to not let Peridot find her? She couldn’t know what was happening in Lapis' mind except that she was triggered and certainly afraid. She had to find her. The panic takes the better of her. Short on breath, she looked back at Amethyst with a dark stare. It was her fault. She was the one who hurt her mate. She strides over menacingly toward the crystal gem and a very lost Zuli. 

“Congratulations you clod! You hurt Lapis! Ugh, why do you Quartz have to be so insensitive?! I swear by the Diamonds if...”

She snaps back when she sees the hurt in her best friend's eyes. The purple gem already knew perfectly that she fucked up badly. Clearly feeling awful for what happened. Peridot tries to bite back her anger and concern, her lips pressed between her teeth. She forced herself to take in a shaky breath.

However she was stopped before she could apologize when she felt a heavy hand on her shoulder, making her jump and squeak. She looked back and saw Garnet, her expression difficult to read through her visor. Peridot clenched her teeth, wondering why her--of all gems-- wanted with her. Why she couldn’t have come seconds before Amethyst screwed up. She should have know with her stupid future vision! The perma-fusion leans forward before talking to her calmly, her voice composed and warm. 

“Everything will be okay Peridot. Trust me. You just need to be there for Lapis right now. Take your time and go find her. She will be in the woods beside the water tower, but I’m sure you knew that,” Garnet assured, just like she always could. Because she did know this kind of thing, didn’t she ?

Feeling a little lost, but trusting the fusion was the only thing she had right now. After all, despite everything that has happened, Garnet had been there for her. To help her understand and adapt to the earth in her most difficult times. She would be lying if she didn’t admit that she has admired the gem and her wisdom.

She closed her eyes, releasing the tension in her shoulders and concentrated on her breathing for a bit. She felt a little better; grounded. Even if her cheeks took a darker tint when Garnet started talking again.

“And Peridot?” Garnet starts, a smile tugging at the corner of her lips. “I’m impatient to meet a certain someone, but please don’t pressure yourself so much about it.I know you’re afraid, but it’ll work out. You two are made for each other. Just take your time.”

It embarrassed Peridot even more, but in a way, it made her happy. Garnet knew the struggle in her heart about the sore subject, and her gentle words reassured her.. It made her even more determined. One day she will show Lapis how much she loved her, how she didn’t had to be afraid of fusion, and how fusion could be a beautiful thing. They would create something magnificent, and so different from Malachite. She was certain about it! She just needed to take one step at a time.

She looked at Amethyst, who nearly cowered at her. Peridot hugged her quickly and whispered an apology. She felt her best friend relax into her arms, returning the light embrace. The quartz took a step back, grinning before giving her a hearty punch on the arm.

“It’s okay P-dot. Now go find your girl. And tell her about much of an insensitive clod I am. But also tell her I’m really sorry.” She laughed, and pushed her on her way.

Peridot then looked to where Zuli was standing, and she exchanged a look with her, but soon after, the gem just avoided her gaze, sprouting her wings in a vain attempt to leave. Garnet's voice resonated again, calling after the Lapis Lazuli.

“And you are Zuli I presume?” Zuli nods. “We have to talk.” Her tone wasn’t aggressive, but it was flat and sharp.

In a way, Zui already knew what Garnet wanted to talk about. The fusion already alluded to her about the whole flirting-with-Peridot-scheme, and the way she was trying to get between her and Lapis.

It wasn’t well received.

But Zuli never really took it seriously. After all, Lapis just mated with this Peridot due to a marking heat, it was nothing serious, in her mind. It wouldn’t change anything if she tried to get the little Peridot for herself. Well, it was what she was thinking before seeing all of this. After seeing how much the green gem cared for her mate, she doesn't deserve a place there.. So even before talking with Garnet, she had made her mind. Well it was either that, or talking about her sister. . . . She had to try to find her after all of this, even if Laz refused to follow her to Little Homeworld, she was still worried.

Peridot didn’t wait to see the exchange. By extending her hand, a trashcan lid floated toward her thanks to her ferrokinesis. She quickly jumped on it, and started her way to the water tower. She refused to let Lapis down.

For her part, Lapis just needed to be alone. Just to be far away from Little Homeworld. At least for a while. She knew that Jasper wouldn’t be able to come near her here. It was way too high for the Quartz to reach her. She liked altitude. It usually calmed her, and the proximity of water, the source of her power, made her feel secure. However, surrounded by her guarded silence, her mind began to drift.

Steven's voice was clear in her head. He warned her off from the forest, as that was where Jasper stayed. He knew that Lapis preferred to avoid the brute as much as possible. Especially now that they lived on the same planet. In the very same city.

She stood from where she sat, looking into the forest with an empty gaze. Panic started to take over her body then, fear flooding her mind. Jasper must be there. It was the only place she had to come back to. Even after what happened. She was stuck on Earth after all. Jasper was so close, and while her natural instinct told her to fly, to put as much distance as she could between her and the Quartz . . . Something else started to burn in her chest. Even the annoying voice in her head was muffled.

She had to go to see Jasper. 

She had to talk with her. Not like the time on the boat. Not with Steven trying to interfere, and protect her. Not while feeling so low, and still overwhelmed by culpability for what happened with Malachite, blaming herself for everything. She had her fault, that was true. But now she was feeling better and she had changed. She was a better person now, but still, she couldn’t move on. Not while knowing Jasper was still holding to the idea of fusing, of forming Malachite again. So she had to confront Jasper. She had to make her understand. Even if she was afraid to see the Quartz again, just remembering her face made her shiver and delve into bad memories of her old self . . . she has made her decision. If she wanted to fuse again, she needed to take care of everything left from the scar from the past.

So Lapis started downwards into the woods. Searching for some tracks or anything that would lead her to Jasper. It wasn’t difficult. She quickly found an open area where only tree stumps were left and there was no green grass left on the ground. Just rocks. She was certain no animal would be able to do this. It must have been Jasper; Jasper and her healthy hate for organic life. Her feet finally touched the ground again, and she looked around, searching any traces of those oranges hues which haunted many of her nightmares.

Then a groan was heard among the usual noises of the living forest surrounding them. It made her blood run cold. She froze like cornered prey, but she held back her instinct to flee, biting down the fear constricting her throat. She looked around if she could see the gem who made the noise.

Then she saw her, coming from the small cave in front of her, where old rags were used as curtains to close the entrance. The Quartz was unaware of her presence, massaging her temples. She seemed in pretty bad shape . . . and not only because of her precedent fights, but the traces of corruption left on the form of green splotches on her body and horns had done a number on her. It made her more intimidating. It was hard to believe Lapis could have been even as close to scary compared to her.

Suddenly, she saw those yellow eyes--the same eyes which were engraved in her mind for so long now. They looked back at her in surprise. Lapis noticeably gulped at this, squaring her shoulders and there was a moment of labored silence. It was as tense as walking in a mine field. She hated it.

“Lapis . . . “ breathed out the Quartz, astounded. Her surprise then twisted into something else. An expression that made Lapis’ heart drop. Hope. Then Jasper smiled like a mad woman. The grin stretched wide, showing off all her teeth. Happiness radiating from her. Her feet moved fast, as if they were long friends ready to embrace after not seeing each other for years. “I knew you would come back one day! I knew it ! We are made to be together. I told you! If only you had listened to me sooner--”

“No!” Lapis cut off, not able to stay silent anymore. Her whole body shook when she yelled, and she was glad her voice didn’t crack. Her limbs couldn’t stop their trembling. “Stop it! I don’t . . . I don’t want Malachite back.” Her voice said a bit more quietly, her throat sore after she had forced her cry before it.

The look on Jasper's face would have broken her heart if she could understand. She cared only a tiny bit for her despite everything. She wanted to end Malachite’s reign over both of their minds after all. But her pain, especially about this, did her nothing. Still, when her eyes came a bit lower, she saw the gem taking place on its owner's nose with a noticeable crack in it. It was a tiny fissure along all it’s length, but shock was painted on her face when she saw this. She couldn’t ask. There was a dark voice inside her murmuring “she deserves it.” It made her sick. She knew she would have to tell Steven about this. She wasn’t heartless. Despite everything that happened between her and Jasper, she refused that another gem had to live with a cracked gem as she did for so long.

Yet she was yanked off her thoughts when the burly Quartz took her by the elbows, forcing her to look at her, her hold firm on her slender frame. She couldn’t move, and it made her scared. Like a deer between headlights, and she just looked at the acid yellow eyes. They clearly were pleading for her, in a desperate manner that made her anxiety skyrocket.

“Please Lapis. Listen to me at least! Try to consider giving Malachite a chance. Give us a chance! We can do so much better!” It was all the same empty promises again and again, and it made Lapis’ head spin. She couldn’t look at Jasper, but the vibrant orange hues were all she could see. “ I missed you so much you know . . . ? I fused with many gems after, but not one of them could measure up to you and what we had. I even fused with another Lapis Lazuli! I was so happy to find Malachite again. But, it wasn’t the same. It wasn’t our Malachite.”

She seemed so broken, and it reminded Lapis of herself some years ago. Angry, desperate, and so fucking sad. Yet, she couldn’t fall for it. She refused to let the soldier indulge her to fuse with her again.

She was about to respond, to deny the demand once again and to explain herself. But when she opened her mouth, Jasper cut her off again, refusing to listen to what she had to say for now. She was way too broken and hopeful to think about letting the other gem express herself.

“I know Lapis, I know that Malachite was forged from hate, but feeling so powerful, in unity with another gem as broken, and as angry as me. I felt as if you understood me. You accepted me and fought to keep me! It was twisted but beautiful. And I know you enjoyed it too. We both needed Malachite.” Hope shone in her eyes, while she kneeled just in front of the blue gem, a small smile appearing on her lips, despite the lack of response from Lapis.

On the contrary, Lapis’ glare started to darken, a raspy and shaky small voice coming from her mouth.

“I’m . . . I’m not like this anymore Jasper. I changed--for the better. I’m happy now. Well, almost happy at least . . . “ Lapis bit her lip, letting a heavy breath escape her nose. She started to calm down, but a dull feeling took place in her chest instead. She was just so weary, nearly lethargic. 

And suddenly, her anxiety spiked again when the Quartz came back on her feet, hugging her face and coming close, so close that she felt her breath on her skin, which gave her a shiver of disgust. “I changed Lapis. I promise. That’s why I know that we can do it. It will be so much better now. I can make you happy, I know it. I’m the only one strong enough to put up with the storm that you hide inside you.”

Lapis hated to be reminded of this. Of the beast lurking inside her, that she was so afraid of now. Because she knew that if she let it come back, everything she worked for, everything that made her happy, would disappear. So much hurt passed through her wavering eyes. She wanted to forget its existence, she wanted to believe that it was gone. And at this, Jasper saw hesitation, so she pressed even more, hugging her head tighter, and her fingers combed through her hair.

“Please Lapis,” she begged. “Leave the Crystal Gems. You’re not cut out to be with them. With me, you can be who you really are. Join the Rebellion I started against the Diamonds! You’ll be able to get back your glory before this Era 3. You’ll have your title back! You won’t be a nobody anymore. And if we fuse, I’ll let you have total control over Malachite--over me. I’ll be loyal, always at your side, supporting you, protecting you. I’ll make you my queen. So, please Lapis, fuse with me again.” Lapis has never seen her plead like this before. The fierce and sturdy soldier hated to be weak, but for Lapis--for Malachite--she would become her own enemy just to have their monster.

Yet, she wasn’t able to reach Lapis as she wanted. The water gem was just frozen, looking right into her. Fear, disgust, sadness, mixed in her tortured navy eyes. Everything about Jasper's speech was sick and twisted and it creeped her out. What the most disturbing thing was though was how much Jasper misunderstood everything. How she thought that Lapis would be able to betray those who saved her. To betray Peridot.

She pushed Jasper away, taking some steps backwards. Clenching her teeth, she forced her words out, “You know, I missed Malachite too. For a long time. That fusion--It made me feel good. Capturing you, and lashing out on you was an easy outlet for me. It made me happy and miserable at the same time. But then your anger? The pain you made me endure? I needed it. I felt like I deserved it. I thought I had to be punished for all the destruction and pain I caused.” Her voice wavered, as she moved away from the soldier, her body shaking, as she confessed the darkest part of her long life. But she had to do it.

Jasper on her part was suddenly silent, she knew all of this, she shared everything with this gem when they were fused. But listening to her words was different. Seeing the water gem acknowledge all of this was disturbing, and hearing it made her realize how dark it was. Yet, she wasn’t afraid of this. She was able to endure everything for her. Even this twisted part of her being. So she made a few steps toward the shaking gem, before stopping dead in her tracks when Lapis talked again.

“But as I said to you last time, it wasn’t healthy! It messed with me, and even now, I still have to suffer the consequences. So how can you? How can you want that back? It made both of us miserable! Why did you have to fuse with Laz and bring Malachite back? You’re better than that, Jasper. I’m better than that. Why don’t you want to move forward and forget it once and for all?” She started to scream each one of her words to Jasper's face, which had crumpled into disappointment; shame. Especially when she saw tears starting to form in the blue gem’s eyes. The same eyes that she missed for years now. But she was just silent, unable to speak, or to explain. So Lapis continued, her voice breaking down. 

“I will never form Malachite again with you Jasper. So drop it please. It ruined the experience of fusion for me. By the diamonds, I can’t even fuse with the gem I love! Fusions are supposed to be a representation of trust, but I can’t even trust myself with this anymore. I don’t want to hurt my mate as we had hurt each other. . . . And I’m sorry, Jasper” She hiccupped, not able to hold back her cry. Not even aware of what information she dropped on the Quartz. But honestly, she didn’t care at all. It was true, and she needed to say it, to express it, instead of bottling up all of this.

And it was needless to say that the soldier, which was obsessed with the water gem for so long now, was speechless. Shock twisted her features. She was so taken aback by what the gem she hadn’t seen in years revealed, that the fact she was rejected again wasn’t processed fully. Both gems being so caught up in their discussion that none of them saw Peridot approaching them slowly from the trees, her trash can lid under her arm.

“A mate . . . ? You have a mate? Since when? Why?” Jasper blurted, waving her giant hands in front of Lapis in a panicked gesture. It was less to say that the giant Quartz was pretty shocked by the news, a note of disappointment starting to show itself in her tone.

Lapis tried to calm herself, using her powers to throw aside the starts of tears that formed in the corner of her eyes. And when she saw her former captor so touched by the simple information of her, already taken by another gem, she scoffed lightly. A dry laugh escaping from her lips. It was the only thing that was able to be registered by the obstinate soldier. She didn’t had the patience to deal with this. Jasper wasn’t even enamored with her or anything like this, she was just obsessed by Malachite and power, and she knew it. She was fused for so long with her that she knew every thought that crossed her mind back then. It was just an unhealthy obsession and possessiveness. Lapis was far happier with Peridot, the small technician showing her what true love was every day of her life along her side. She didn’t have the heart to justify herself in front of Jasper. Hell, she didn’t have to justify herself. She refused to tint the only light in her heart by involving Jasper with it anyways. Lapis simply hoped it would be enough to make the orange gem turn a new page, and once and for all forget her.

She set a steady glare at Jasper, hoping that the Quartz would understand that pressing the subject further would make things end sourly. If it hadn’t already. But said Quartz was just staring back, astounded, as lost as a puppy. Everything was sinking in. 

Suddenly Lapis was yanked off from her thought when she felt something, or rather someone, take a tender hold on her hand. And when she turned back, she saw her mate's concerned face, and she was reassured to have the smaller gem beside her.

“Lapis? Are you okay?” Peridot questioned, caressing Lapis’ hand, looking right in her eyes to search for a response. The former terraformer only gave her a tiny nod. But it was enough to give Peridot some confidence and reassure her.

Quickly, Peridot eyes shifted toward the striped Quartz in front of them, looking at the two mates dumbly. And when her former teammate sent a nasty glare towards her, full of hatred, she finally understood. All the pieces of the puzzle started to fit together.

“Don’t you dare hurt Lapis again, Jasper! Or I will not hesitate to poof you again. This is my only warning!” snapped Peridot, taking a protective stance in front of Lapis, her lid still under her arm, ready to be used if it needed to.

It’s at this moment that Lapis knew that the situation was dangerous, Jasper was stupid most of the time, but even she would understand this. Knowing how jealous the brute was able to get, she feared for her mate. Starting to panic, she was about to grab her mate and fly away from any threat that Jasper would be able to throw at them, but then a loud laugh escaped from the burly woman's lips.

The laugh was getting louder, and even more, the Quartz held her sides while she was clearly laughing her ass off. The sound froze Lapis’ blood, while Peridot growled, ready to strike. She was laughing so much that tears started to form at the corner of her eyes or at least it was what the couple thought. But they were quickly proven wrong when Jasper stopped to humor herself dead in her tracks, and that tiny lines of tears rolled down her cheeks despite her large smile.

“Sorry, sorry. I mean, I knew that you traitor joined the Crystal gems, but I mean . . . you? And Lapis? Are you serious? I lost Lapis over a runt like you? And you mated with her? How can you even satisfy her?” Jasper gave a sour laugh, a hand coming into her wild mane, the other going over her eyes, drying them.. Yet, she winced when she felt the thin fissure starting to spread a bit more, making pieces of the orange gem fall off from it.

A grunt escaped from Lapis throat, ready to defend her mate's honor. Seeing the state the quartz soldier was in, she knew that Peridot and her had the upper hand if Jasper wanted to fight them. Even if having to defend herself against the brute and putting her mate in danger was a scary idea for her. She just wished that Jasper wasn’t stupid enough to pick a fight here and now with a broken gem. Lapis then tensed suddenly when the big Quartz wavered in front of them and ended up falling on her knees in front of them, still laughing, quietly now though. But the way it sounded was painful to hear even if it was difficult for them to have compassion for the gem who tormented them both for so long now.

“Malachite will never come back, right?” her hoarse voice was heard again, but all the hatred, the anger, was gone now. Leaving it only tortured and flat.

The two mates looked at each other, worried, clearly not knowing what to do in such a situation. It was the first time they saw the proud gem so . . . weak. Yet, they decided to twist the knife in the wound and Lapis nodded.

“Yeah, she won’t. Never again.” She needed to root out the evil once and for all even if it was difficult for Jasper to hear this. She had to. Nothing would be able to change if it continued like this as it already did for some years now.

A broken croak came out of Jasper’s throat, as she hid her face behind her hand, a quiet “why” making itself heard through her clenched teeth. At this, Lapis nearly lost it, as if what she said before wasn’t enough for the Quartz. But what followed made her keep her piece of mind to herself. 

“Why does everyone leave me? First, my diamond, who preferred stupid organic life instead of me. Then you, and even the corrupted Ocean Jasper wanted to escape from me! And now that snotty Lazuli who bailed directly when things started to go sour! When I thought that we had the same objectives . . . I’ve had enough of this! I fought alone for so long, trying to prove myself, but I’m sick of this now. Yet it seems that I'm doomed to continue alone after all,” Jasper growled bitterly through her laugh, clearly losing it. And the hand in front of her face clenched suddenly and she punched the pile of rocks right beside her, making it crack and fall to the ground.

It was hard to not have pity for the former soldier, and Lapis was the best suited to know every struggle that Jasper had to fight alone before they even met. She had shared the same mind with her for a pretty long damn time after all. Even if the Quartz didn’t follow the right direction to better herself, she knew that she suffered. So if Jasper and her had to part ways after all of this, she wanted to at least give her one last piece of advice. If the orange gem took it seriously or not was her own problem. So Lapis crouched cautiously in front of Jasper, as if she was approaching a scared, wounded animal. Peridot, behind her, took a fighting stance, while she had morphed her trash lid into a sharp pole. If Jasper would tempt anything, since she was so desperate, she was ready.

Then, Lapis' voice followed. She talked low and warmly, contrasting to every other time she addressed the quartz soldier.

“Jasper, you need to make peace with yourself. To let go of Malachite, to understand that Rose--well, Pink Diamond--didn’t abandon you personally, but her rank. For the sake of love. Stop being so angry, and open yourself to other people, and maybe you’ll find someone too. After all, it worked for me. Yes, I’m not ready to fuse again yet, but everything else is going smoothly.” She turned slowly to Peridot, giving her a warm and enamored smile, making the younger gem blush a bit, before Lapis gave all her attention to Jasper again. “So, give yourself a chance and you might stop being alone.” Lapis breathed softly, and she was kind of reassured to find hope in Jasper’s eyes, nearly reading a new resolution in them.

And in a smooth movement, Lapis was standing up again, her voice a bit more firm and cold now.

“And please, do yourself a favor and swallow your pride. Go see Steven and ask him to heal your gem. You’ll shatter yourself at this rate. I’m certain that he will accept. Steven doesn't hold grudges.” 

Without saying anything else, she started to go back to her mate. 

She couldn’t be happier to see her mate. She felt so relieved, and so much lighter. She knew that she had done what was right even if it had been difficult. Maybe she would be able to truly leave her past in the dust. She could finally move on and start something new with the gem her heart chose.

Jasper decided to let them be and just returned inside her cave, a thoughtful look on her face. The two other gems started to walk toward the forest again, before Lapis summoned her water wings and lifted Peridot, hugging her from behind, starting to fly with her, as they used to do before the small metal bender learnt how to fly by herself.

The trip back to Little Homeworld was fast and uneventful, no words exchanged between them. They just bathed into a sweet feeling of accomplishment and freedom. Peridot was just happy to see her mate peaceful again.

Going down on the small balcony of their shared home, Lapis made her wings disappear and softly dropped her mate on the wood. She had mixed feelings after all of this. She felt mostly good, but she was just tired; emotionally drained, so she took some steps toward a black bean bag that Peridot often used when she was lazing out on her tablet, and she let all her body crash on it sluggishly, letting a long sight escape from her lips.

She stayed a moment like this, her eyes closed, and when she felt the beanbag shift a bit, a small smile appeared on her thin lips. Guessing it was her mate joining her, she just extended an arm and pulled Peridot closer. The green gem fell on top of her, laying against her chest in a tender hug. She snuggled against her, her face finding its place between Lapis’ shoulder and neck. It felt so good to be like this with her. Especially when she had been so afraid to lose the water gem all over again. She needed to feel her like this, to feel close to her, and to feel connected like this and she was desperate for affection. Lapis tightened her arms around her, needing some sort of comfort after everything that happened in the last few hours.

Yet, something still bothered Peridot after what she witnessed. The thought came back and frustrated her because she didn’t understand as to why. She started to talk quietly, her sounds muffled against her mate's skin, as if she was afraid it would trigger her lover all over again. 

“Say Lapis . . . is what you said to Jasper true? That you’re afraid to hurt me if--if we decide to fuse?” Peridot asked in a tiny voice, not moving at all from her spot. Until Lapis softly pulled away, taking her mate’s shoulders to make her look right into her eyes. A serious expression painted on her face, even if a glint of sadness shone in her dark blue orbs.

“It’s true. Do you know that when you fuse with someone, you have to share everything with them? All your thoughts, and all your emotions. I don’t want to impose you with this. I can’t trust myself after all that happened to me. . . .” Lapis sighed, dejected. As if she was the only reason that kept them apart like this. And when Peridot started to talk, she just put a finger on her lips.

“I already hurt you too many times. So don’t try to say otherwise. I even pushed myself on you last time, just because I was too weak to control my heat. I’m . . . I’m really happy with what we share. That you’re my mate, but it doesn’t change what happened, and how it happened. How do you want me to trust myself with fusion or this . . . ?” She bites her lips, looking down, not able to confront her partner's gaze.

Then she suddenly felt Peridot's hands going through her blue hair, caressing her head, and Peridot tilted her head up to look into her eyes. She flushed a royal blue, especially at seeing her lover so close to her face, feeling her warm breath on her lips. She loved when Peridot looked at her like this. Just so much endearment and care. 

“I trust you Lapis. I know you lived through hard times, but you don’t have to carry all of it alone. You’ve changed so much. I know you love me, and I know you won’t hurt me if we ever fuse together. You don’t have to be scared about it,” she murmured sweetly, before kissing Lapis forehead, her hands going to her cheeks, caressing them in a tender touch.

Lapis nearly denied what Peridot stated, but the words made her heart ache with hopes, and she wanted to believe. She needed to believe. Each time she felt her partner’s lips on her face, peppering several kisses on every part of it, she felt lighter, indulging herself into the comfort that Peridot procured to her. She felt her mate's lips meeting hers warmly, making her face take darker colors all over again. Responding to the kiss deeply, she hugged the gem tighter. Peridot smiled widely against her lips. She just wanted to make her mate feel good and forget all those bad things which had overwhelmed her thoughts. She just wished that the blue gem would regain self-confidence and see herself for how Peridot saw her. A beautiful and fierce gem, full of love and strength.

“I had missed you, Lapis. I missed feeling so close to you. I know that what happened was because of your heat. But you don’t have to feel guilty. What really matters to me is your feelings for me. You never forced me--you held back for me even if it hurt you. I wanted it, and I loved it and I want to feel all of it again. If you can’t trust yourself then, please, trust me . . .” Peridot said, rocking Lapis slowly against her while her lips grazed her neck.

The water gem whimpered slightly, blushing furiously in her mate's arms. She didn’t dare to move at all, as if it would scare Peridot away and make her stop. She wasn’t able to decide if she wanted her to stop or not. She wanted it--she desperately wanted to feel her mate so intimately again, She wasn’t able to count the times where she was left hot and bothered after Peridot was a bit too affectionate with her. Especially now that she knew what she missed. Still, she hated the feeling of not deserving it, that her lover did only this to satisfy her and to reassure her. So she pushed back the knot in her throat and forced the words through it, stopping Peridot.

“Are you sure . . . ? Do you actually want me right now? You’re not just doing this to comfort me, right?” Lapis worried, hating to have so many doubts. Gnawing at her lower lip, she wasn’t even able to look Peridot in the eye, afraid to see her lover's expression.

“You’re such a clod,” Peridot murmured, a mad cyan blush crept on her cheeks, and it sounded as a name of endearment this time. “Of course I want this! I’ve done research about how to please you for a reason! I want to make you feel good, like you did for me last time.” She affirmed, way more assurance despite her embarrassment, fidgeting a bit on the blue gem’s lap.

“Oh,” was the only tangible thing that Lapis was able to respond with, clearly surprised--and rather a bit--aroused. She wondered what Peridot had learnt about “pleasure” on this tablet of hers. Her lips pressed together. She looked at her embarrassed partner, reassured, but still expecting to see her do the next step.

Peridot noticed, and could feel her cheeks go warmer. After a couple of discussions, she understood that these kinds of things were rather embarrassing to talk about freely. Taking courage in both hands, she decided to just remove her visor, letting green meet blue.

“I love you, Lapis. . . . So please just let me show it,” she breathed, coming close to her mate's face again before kissing her softly. She felt her partner relax against her and respond to her kiss with fervor.

Lapis internally squealed. She wasn’t like that usually, but Peridot was the only gem able to bring it out. She adored Peridot, she felt so loved and important to her, and damn, if she wasn’t able to fuse with her right now, at least she was able to make love with her.

The kiss grew in intensity, and she sighed softly when she felt Peridot’s tongue gently traced her lips. In the few times they had this kind of exchange after their first time mating, Lapis was the one leading, but feeling Peridot take control was relieving. So she just parted her lips to let her lover circle her tongue around hers, while small hands started to caress her naked arms.

But the innocent touches started to go behind her back, a hand sneaking between her body and the beanbag to draw soothing circles between her shoulder blades. Lapis jolted when she felt the soft pads of her fingers against her gemstone. At the same time, Peridot gently bit her lower lip and Lapis let a small whine escape from her mouth. The area around her gem and in her lower region starting to tingle pleasantly.

Proud of herself, Peridot snickered a bit, ending the kiss, a string of saliva breaking between their two mouths. She looked at Lapis, satisfied, knowing perfectly that what she had read on the internet was right.. Then, with confidence, she continued caressing the gemstone under her fingertips, feeling it start to get warmer under her touch. Her wet kisses were back on Lapis’ neck, letting her present her blue skin with a tilt of her head, mewling lowly at her mate's continued attention. 

She just loved to hear Lapis, usually so composed and calm, expressing herself freely. It was really hard for her to not get too excited when she remembered Lapis' state when she was in heat. She just hoped that she would be a good learner and that she would be able to make her mate come totally undone, and make her forget everything except their shared bond and the pleasure coming from it.

Encouraged by the soft sounds and wanting to hear more of them, she decided to be a bit more daring and she kissed soft blue lips harshly. Sucking and biting her lips and tongue with her sharp teeth. Soon her other hand started to caress the naked stomach under her, sighing dreamily when she felt defined abs flex under her touch. Her partner was just stunning. She couldn’t understand what a beautiful gem like Lapis found in a puny gem like her, but she wasn’t complaining. She was glad that Lapis liked her the way she was.

Then Peridot gripped the gemstone in her hand when she felt the blue gem hips buck under her. A whine escaped from her busy mouth when she felt friction between her legs despite her leotard. Only this renewed the fire in her and her desire to please her mate even more. She was on the right track. Peridot pressed her hips against Lapis' ones, preventing the gem from moving too much under her.

Her green hand started to disappear under the blue material of Lapis’ crop top, and she softly cupped the mound she found. Stopping the passionate kiss, she moved a bit away to look at Lapis with amazement, loving the feeling of the squishy and warm hard light of her partner's chest. She had stars in her eyes when she squished the mound a bit, and the blue gem responded with a soft hum, encouraging her to continue.

Peridot couldn’t restraint herself, she needed to see more of her. She really didn’t have the occasion the first time as she was way too much lost in the unknown pleasure offered to her when it happened. So, she slowly removed the clothes which obstructed her vision of her mate's body. Her eyes were still locked on Lapis’, who only blushed more under her lover's intense look. 

Lapis felt herself getting wetter with each second under her mate’s gaze, shifting shyly under her. She couldn’t help it. She felt even more excited and hot when Peridot looked at her naked chest like this, clearly reading the desire in her partner's eyes. Lapis whined pathetically when Peridot took her time to admire her like this. Silently begging for Peridot to touch her, she couldn’t handle the staring.

It seemed to have the desired effect. She huffed a bit, embarrassed. Caught in the act of staring, but Peridot didn’t make Lapis wait anymore. Her hands cupped both of her soft mounds, making the blue gem shudder in pleasure. The nipples hardening under her palms.

The water gem just let her small mate take care of her, only encouraging her with tiny moans and rubbing her back. It was rare to see Peridot take the lead, so she enjoyed it while she was able to. She was more than impatient to discover what the gem had learned. A tingling warmness overwhelmed her lower belly at the thought. So she just closed her eyes and let her head hit the beanbag with a small smile on her lips, enjoying Peridot being so sweet to her.

Still, she was taken aback, a wail escaping her lips when she felt her partner lips on her hard nipple. Sucking them lovingly before biting the tender flesh gently. A fresh wave of desire washed over her, making her buck again against her donor. Her ragged breath peaked, feeling Peridot's mouth starting to move downward her body, leaving trails of marks.

She loved the slow pace and tender passion, but it started to make her frustrated. However, she let her mate dictate the rhythm and do whatever she pleased to her body. Yet she started to crave more. She wanted to feel her donor inside her already, her core clenching against nothing at the mere idea, making her feel so empty.

Lapis whines for her mate, hoping it would catch her attention and make her understand that she was getting impatient. But the only response was a rough bite on her hip, making her tense and shiver. Moaning when she felt the purple tongue go over the bite mark to sooth the pain. She really wondered what Peridot had read to know how to make her feel so pleasingly weak and horny.

And then she hummed happily when she felt the small donor work on the ribbon which tied her pants. However, Lapis wasn’t patient anymore when she saw her struggle with it. She made the clothes vanish into emptiness in a flash of light. She looked at Peridot with a small satisfied smile, presenting herself with a blush, her long blue legs spreading to let her mate look at her intimate parts.

Her small tentacle was still hidden, only a tent under her sheath proving its existence, but what really showed her desire was the neon blue wetness covering her lower lips and tights. From what Lapis was able to see, Peridot’s uniform was equally ruined by a large wet spot between her legs. Her mate was in the same state as her. Her gaze shifted back right to Peridot's eyes, looking at her with reserved impatience while she bit her lower lip. She felt herself clench around nothing again, throbbing with want that she couldn’t repress anymore. But Peridot didn’t seem inclined to satisfy her yet.

No. What was coming next was even more surprising; she felt the green gem hover above her again, her mouth exploring each centimeter of her blue skin. Her warm mouth leaves heavenly sensations on her burning skin, making her struggle to not just cry out how much she needed her mate inside her. But she restrained this as much as she could. She wanted to enjoy the moment as long as possible, even if she burned from desire and frustration.

Then Peridot phased out her clothes in a bright light. But the blue gem didn’t have time to enjoy her partner’s naked form. She started to slide along her body, going off her lap and kneeling right in front of her, her lips going between her thighs, leaving bitemarks and hickeys, making Lapis go wild at the sensation which made her core burn up even more. But that’s when she felt Peridot's mouth go higher then, and she understood what her mate had in mind. Opening her eyes, wide and round, she tensed, a furious royal blue color on her burning cheeks. Looking right at her small partner, still between her legs.

At this reaction, the blonde seemed unsure for a second, and Lapis clearly struggled to say anything due to her ragged breathing, her excitation at its peak.

“Y-You don’t have to do that!” Lapis squeaked suddenly, moan threatening to escape just by feeling her lover's warm breath on her soaked groin. 

After analyzing the situation, a warm smile crept up on Peridot’s lips, and she started to leave some hot kisses on Lapis soaked thighs, just before her mouth met her core suddenly, making the blue gem cry out from pleasure. Soon after, her tongue started to lick all along her slit, taking her first taste of the salty and sweet liquid coming from her lover's crotch. She expected the body fluid not to taste really good, but the blue wetness was strangely sweet on her tongue and it made her wetter. The noises coming from the older gem wasn’t helping her at all, but Lapis’ pleasure was more important for her at this moment. She wanted to please her partner. She pushed down her own excitement.

She worked harder, her tongue dipping between the swollen lips, searching for the tiny bundle of nerves that she knew would make her lover scream. At least, that’s what she read on her tablet. But she wasn’t able to find it, it wasn’t where she expected it to be. Even if gem reproductive organs were more or less like human ones, the only reference she had found on the internet was nothing that could help her. Still, it didn’t discourage her. On the contrary, she continued to lick her mate’s opening, sucking tenderly at her lower lips, collecting as much liquid as she could.

The blue gem was lost in pleasure, her core twitching like crazy at how much it was teased. She cried out and yet, still, her mate’s tongue was doing miracles on her. It wasn’t enough though, and while one of her hands was in the blonde’s hair, grasping, her other hand starting to massage her sheath, left untouched until now. It didn’t take long before she spread her slit with two fingers, letting the tentacle evert from it, slathered in wetness.

Whimpering lowly, Lapis gently pulled at her lover's hair, trying to get her focus back, desperate for some attention there too. It didn’t take long before the Peridot understood, looking at the small organ which had appeared on her mate before letting her tongue circle around it, her lips joining just after to suck lightly on the sensitive part. 

Lapis' reaction was just perfect. The blue gem groaned loudly and tensed. Arching above her from the pleasure. With a long smile Peridot continued to tease her, lovingly when the small tentacle poured some more neon blue liquid in her mouth, clearly showing how much her partner enjoyed this.

Lapis was so close thanks to her mate's mouth now, but she refused to let go. She didn’t want this to finish yet. She tried to contain her orgasm that festered in liquid heat in her gut. No. She needed to feel Peridot fill her--she knew that the sweet release would be even better then. She wanted to be one with her mate once again, and that only would satisfy her. She took her lover's face in her hands and forced her to sit up straight once again.

All Peridot could do was stop and obey, looking up at the bluenette, a bit lost, blue fluids still all over her mouth. Some even dripping down her to her collarbone and chest. Lapis looked at this mess with an enamored expression, her thumb taking off some of the moisture from her lips, before leaning toward her. She kissed Peridot softly, her lips leaving just after to go on the gemstone embedded in her forehead, humming against it when she felt how warm it was. Her younger partner responded only with a whine, her small hands balling on her knees. Still blushing softly despite what she just did. Then the tempting lips went right beside one of her ears hidden by her wild locks of hair.

“Come here, Peri. I want to feel you inside me,” Lapis whispered, a gravelly tone full of desire.

It peaked her mate's attention, and she was furiously blushing, her whole face taking a cyan tint. Peridot was even able to feel herself get wetter, the green fluid rushing out, falling on the ground under her. Yet, she felt herself start to panic a bit and get even more flustered. She shifted uncomfortably, before looking between her legs where her tentacle was still hidden. It was really awkward and embarrassing, but she totally didn’t understand this part of herself. She found nothing about this, because it didn’t look like human anatomy at all, and when she tried herself, several times, to make it go out like Lapis’ did last time, she wasn’t able to do it. She wasn’t even able to get all hot and bothered all alone. It just . . . didn’t happen.

She didn’t understand the interest that everyone had with self-pleasure. It seemed so pointless to her. Pleasure always came hand in hand with her strong feelings for Lapis. Her best turn on being when she felt loved and close to her mate. And even if she never heard about what sex was before everything, she understood that it might have been the reason why she never felt such urges in the past. Yet, it was still embarrassing to admit that. That, a Peridot, a bright and clever gem, didn’t understand how her own body worked.

So she stayed shyly silent for a moment, before opening her mouth one time, two times, and it’s just when she felt her partner’s hand caress soothing circles on her back that she was finally able to admit it.

“I don’t know how to make it come out alone!” she suddenly spilled, rather ashamed. She just wanted to phase back her uniform and run away, despite the burning need between her legs still going strong. She wasn’t even able to meet her partner's eyes, just waiting for her to laugh at her. She knew that Lapis wasn’t mean, despite what a lot of people would say about her, neither, truly malicious. Yet, she feared a reaction. 

Suddenly, she felt something warm against her cheek. She instantly relaxed when she opened her eyes and saw her mate's tender expression, a shining smile adorning her face while she cradled her cheek in her palm.

“Let me show you,” Lapis whispered, her voice coarse and warm, sitting up straight in front of her.

The blue gem slowly brings Peridot up against her, peppering soft kisses on her gemstone. A low chuckle leaving her lips when she felt the triangular gem heat up against her mouth, the soft glow intensifying. One of her hands started to caress her partner's stomach tenderly, making her tense a bit until her long fingers, starting to play with the blonde hairs above Peridot wet privates.

“First, you need to relax all your muscles, don’t be so tense, and take a deep breath,” she purred, a long smile on her lips while she watched Peridot’s every reaction. She loved how cute and innocent the younger gem was, and yet so desperate to satisfy her. She just loved her; she loved everything about her. Lapis only wanted to treat her equally, to make her feel loved and reassured despite her inexperience. To show her a great time.

Softly, she prodded a finger against the small sheath, making the green gem yelp. Lapis’ heart roared at this. Yet, no tentacle was visible, so she embraced her partner, taking some deep breaths, hoping Peridot would follow her. Her mouth went on the tender flesh of her neck. Soon enough, she felt her mate melt against her. A satisfied sigh came out of Lapis’ mouth, and then she continued, murmuring sweetly.

“You’re a good gem. Absolutely perfect.” She praised. “Do you feel it? Something stirring right there?” Her palm stroked Peridot’s lower abdomen and sheath, spreading green fluid all over it.

Peridot let a long moan slip, watching Lapis' skillful hand, nodding vigorously. She definitely felt something tightening in her lower stomach, making her even more soaked. A sensation that only Lapis was able to get out of her.

“Alright, you’re ready then,” Lapis cooed. “You just need to do this to let it come out.” Letting her fingers come back against the sheath.

She stroked the area around it, making Peridot go mush against her. But she holds her, her arm around her lower back to not let her fall. When she saw that the younger gem looked at what she was doing, she let two fingers slowly spread the small slit. The first few inches of the tentacle showing themselves finally.

Smiling victoriously, Lapis captured her partner's lips in a passionate kiss, letting Peridot moan in her mouth when she started to stroke the already hard and squirming tentacle to make it totally evert from its hiding place. Humming, satisfied at feeling the wet and warm appendage throbbing in her hand, covering it with green, silky moisture. 

Yet, she remembered how worked up Peridot was the first time she stroked her member like this, and this time, she wasn’t patient enough. She needed to feel her partner fill her. Now. Especially after what she had done to her.

So Lapis laid down on the beanbag, without letting her grasp on the slippery tentacle go. On the contrary, she opened her legs to let Peridot go between them, looking at her with a desire uncontained when she presented herself. And finally, to make her younger lover understand what she really needed, she pulled the tentacle toward her in a soft but commanding movement, making Peridot fall above her on all four.

When Peridot looked right back at her, turquoise overflowed her cheeks, surprised. Lapis shared an enamored smile. A hand came into her blonde, disheveled hair to caress her head while she finally sighed hotly, “Please Peri . . . I want to feel you.”

She didn’t have to beg for more. The blue gem bites her lower lips when she feels the tentacle harden more in her grasp, flaring up and erecting a bit more, clearly responding to her own needs and her partner’s desires.

Peridot sat up straight in front of her, on her knees, and she placed a shaky hand on top of Lapis’ as she held the squirming appendage. Peridot started to align with her mate's entrance, still wet and shiny due to her level of excitation, clearly inviting her. Only the extremity of her member rested on the warm lips, while she nervously swallowed. She just hoped that she would be enough to satisfy her mate's needs. 

Calming down, despite her need to shove herself inside her lover to the hilt, she looked languorously at Lapis’ body, taking her sweet time to drink the sight in, her breath hitching at how breathtaking her partner was--under her--clearly begging to be filled. Her writhing member throbbed forcefully against the blue slit, covering it with neon green precum which already flowed out from the extremity, which made Lapis just whine, her hips bucking against her. She couldn’t wait anymore. But when she was ready to beg again, it’s Peridot who interrupted her.

“Stars, you are beautiful . . .” she breathed warmly, making the older gem cheeks shine with a royal blue. But Lapis didn’t have time to react or say anything else, because she suddenly felt her partner’s member starting to slip slowly inside her. A long moan broke out from her lips. 

Lapis couldn’t describe how satisfying, and yet so frustrating, it was to feel Peridot slither in her. Slowly, inch by inch. She felt her mate's tentacle stretch her gradually, and enjoyed each second of it. She wasn’t able to relish in this sensation the first time, as she was way too miserable due to her heat. But this time, it was simply perfect. She was able to feel all the wriggling of her lover rod against her sensitive walls, extending bit by bit, to welcome all of her mate. Moaning and stretching under her partner. She had to bite her lower lip, to not smile widely at the delightful pleasure. It was so good to be able to take their time and simply enjoy each other like this. No heat, no doubts--just pleasure.

She clenched slightly when Peridot was just midway, making the small gem groan and let even more of the burning green fluid flow out, making her wetter. As if she wasn’t already drenched by her own trace of desire.

“By the diamonds, Lapis…” Peridot murmured, feeling herself unable to move forward and force her way through her mate’s clenching walls, but still greatly enjoying how they massaged her tentacle.

Sighting, the blue gem just embraced Peridot, her legs marrying around her partner's hips, making the tentacle go deeper. The both of them moaning hotly in unison. 

“I love feeling you like this,” Lapis whispered in her partner's ear, making the member inside her twitch forcefully, forcing a whine through her lips.

She finally urged the smaller gem, hugging her closer and tightening her legs around her, making the whole member finally slip inside her apart from the largest part at its base. She still couldn’t believe how full she felt with Peridot inside her despite their height difference, but the tentacle was long and girthy enough to hit all the right spots. She longed to feel her mate buried inside her to the hilt, the need to be stretched even more overflowing than everything else.

After a moment where the two just relished in the feeling of being linked together this intimately. Peridot pulled her face back for a better look of her mate, pupils full blown with desire and full of tenderness. When she met Lapis' intense gaze, the soft light emanating from her gem reflecting in her deep blue eyes, she flushed more. Smiling warmly, Lapis tenderly caressed her face, her lips meeting the warm gemstone on her partner's forehead.

“You can move now,” she purred against the gemstone, gasping when she felt Peridot pull back slowly, stroking her tight walls in the most delicious manner.

Peridot shuddered when she felt the cold air hitting her tentacle after being welcomed in her mate's warm depths. It didn’t take long before she thrusted back inside her lover, huffing at the sensations of the walls engulfing her greedily. She soon found a rhythm, languishing and slow, which seemed to please Lapis, seeing how the sounds of pleasure coming from her increased in volume at each movement inside her.

The younger gem felt like she was about to lose her mind, listening to her partner’s whines and moans, Lapis’ praise encouraging her to go deeper, and faster. She wasn’t able to think correctly, especially at the sweet feeling of her most sensitive part being stimulated like this. Each movement of her hips making a wetter mess where they met intimately. Whimpers left her lips at how good she felt, so close to Lapis, sharing this moment with her in the most heavenly manner.

Her mind was blank. It was just filled with Lapis: how she smells, how she sounds, how she feels. Loosening and tightening, and massaging her member, driving her crazy and making her lose all doubts and restraints left in her. It’s when she was able to push the larger part of her tentacle past the tight ring of her lover's slit that she totally lost it. Her sensitive sheath rubbing against her partner lips, her tentacle totally engulfed by the delicious moist warm, it became too much. She felt a swell growing in her lower abdomen, waves of hotness crashing on her and making her shake and moan weakly, her voice breaking.

At this, Lapis was in a total bliss. She felt so full. Peridot’s tentacle stretched her in a wonderful manner, hitting some of her deepest and most sensitive points. The rod throbbed perfectly against it, forcing squeals of pleasure from her mouth. Her nails dug in the small gem’s back, making turquoise crescents in her skin. Suddenly, wind was nearly knocked out of her when she felt her mate strongly thrust in her. Her hips slapped against her skin, getting faster and harder, starting to get desperate in her movements.

It was welcomed with a long moan from the blue gem, her hands getting lost in the wild, blonde hair, her own hips starting to respond to the thrust with as much vigor, making her tremble. 

“You’re doing so great,” she groaned, a deep guttural sound. “Oh stars! Yes, please continue!”

She let her mate's face go in between her breasts, letting the younger gem’s hips thrust faster, She was feeling the tentacle throbbing and even inflating in her, forcing a delicious pressure in her groin. Peridot just groaned and her movements were renewed with a new vigor. Rutting against her mate madly, burying herself as much as she could. Drool running on the boobs her face was buried into, not able to keep it in her mouth as the pleasure overflowed her.

She was once again feeling this inflation in her sensitive parts, making it hotter and hotter at each thrust, harder to keep it from exploding. Her gem rubbed against Lapis' collarbone, sending a shock of electricity through her spine. She suddenly whined in distress, feeling about to burst, unable to restrain herself, especially when Lapis walls clutched at her tentacle so tightly.

“Y-You can . . . ah . . . ! You can let go, Peri . . . mhh. Cum for me. I want-AH! I want to f-feel you.” Lapis moaned, caressing the younger gem’s back, encouraging her, knowing she was about to cum. She herself was nearly there, especially at how much the engorged member inflated in her, rubbing at her most sensitive spots each time it moved.

In total trust, Peridot just stopped fighting against the nerve-wrecking feeling. All her body spasmed in Lapis’ arms, her tentacle fluttering forcefully in her mate, shooting wave after wave of burning fluid in her. She whined weakly, trembling against Lapis. Her hips twitching each time she feels a powerful spasm go through her, making her member let out even more green fluids to fill her lover.

It doesn’t seem to end. Lapis was lost in the blissful sensation of the boiling liquid warming her inside jet after jet, making her suddenly clamp against the tentacle who brought her so much pleasure. Cuming then herself at feeling her mate fill her to the brim. She suddenly lets all her muscles relax and she fell boneless on the bean bag, her walls still throbbing weakly around her lover.

Trying to regain her breathing back, Peridot finally let her face leave its hiding place, her cheeks flushed with turquoise, drool still leaking from the corner of her lips. Totally spent, she slowly came out of her mate, letting the green goo flow out lazily.

Sitting on Lapis’ thigh, she hugged her, in a desperate search of affection after so much emotion. The older gem sits up straighter, peppering soft kisses on the small donor’s face. Peridot let herself indulge herself in the post orgasmic moment, her arms tightening around Lapis neck, as she sighed.

“I love you Lapis,” Peridot murmured. Even if that was a painfully weak way to describe what she felt for her cherished mate.

“Me too . . .” Lapis assured, kissing every centimeter of skin present on her partner's face. Her hands roamed her back, making the younger gem whimper softly.

When she finally backed up a bit to let her poor mate breathe, she took a moment to admire her small frame still shivering against her. But something caught up her attention, and a small smile creeped on her lips.

“You’re still hard,” she stated, her hand meeting the still leaking tentacle, which throbbed against her palm, making Peridot suddenly squeak at the sensation on her rod as she was way too sensitive. The member is still present and erected despite her partner’s orgasm.

“I-I uh . . . I’m sorry! I don’t know!” Peridot didn’t know why it was still everted like this, but the burning want was still overwhelmingly present in her lower regions.

At this, Lapis chuckled, unable to restrain herself at how cute the younger gem was, embarrassed by her own desire as it was still not totally satiated. So she quickly kissed the overwhelmed gem, making her shut up, while she forcefully pushed her on her back. Laying her on the wooden floor, getting between her legs. The tentacle wriggled between her legs, searching for another round of attention, coated thickly with green fluids and making it leak on Peridot’s stomach.

A ravenous smile took its place on Lapis’ lips when they left her mate’s. Hunger suddenly took place in her eyes. She couldn’t let her small mate like this, still aroused, not after the wonderful thing she did with her mouth on her and especially not after the heavenly orgasm she gave her.

“Here, let me take care of this,” she proposed, licking her lips at seeing her squirming lover underneath her like this. 

The look on Lapis’ face was nearly predatory, and still full of desire even after what they did. Her pupils were full blown, staring at Peridot’s trembling frame with a certain craving. It made the younger gem flush in a deep turquoise, averting her gaze, unable to affront Lapis' intense one. She just gave her a timid nod, knowing that the blue gem wouldn’t budge without her consent, despite her state.

The ocean gem started to slither along her body seconds after. Her lips meet her sensitive tentacle in a tender kiss, blue and green fluids covering her lips. It made the appendage twitch. Peridot lets a mewl escape her lips. If Lapis continued like this, she was certain that she would poof right there and then.

But the sensual blue lips of her partner didn’t surround her form despite what she expected. No, she soon felt something entirely different, making her body go haywire, bucking against the air, a wave of heat taking all over her. Her mate fingers caressed her lower lips softly, hidden under her tentacle, wet and puffy after being so aroused, but left untouched until now. Her breathing became uncontrollable at the feeling she never experienced before, opening one of her eyes to look at Lapis with a pleading look. She was just met with her lover’s concerned eyes, her voice low and raspy.

“Is this okay . . . ?” she murmured, still rubbing her crotch, making Peridot totally lose it. Her rod throbs even more, liquid leaking more, soiling her further.

“Yes! Yes! Please, Lapis!” she urged, whining pathetically and spreading her legs as far as she could comfortably go for her lover, wanting to have Lapis as much room to her wet slit. She desperately wanted to feel even more of this new sensation. It was totally different from the one brought by her stimulated tentacle, and yet still, so delicious. She was certain she would love all the things Lapis would do to her.

Peridot gasped suddenly when she felt Lapis’ blunt teeth bite the interior of her thighs, making her shiver. While she was distracted by the warm spreading from the bite, Lapis started to slowly slide a finger inside her tight entrance. Lapis looks carefully at the small gem, afraid of hurting her, and she stops when she feels Peridot’s walls wrap around her finger. Peridot tensed at the alien sensation, It wasn’t bad, neither did it hurt. Rather it was so strange to feel something inside her like this. Was it what Lapis felt when she penetrated her?

Lapis’ hand starts to softly caress her hips, her soft voice trying to make the younger calm down a bit. “Relax Peri, I promise it’ll be good,” she encouraged, a tender smile meeting Peridot. She doesn't move anymore, waiting patiently for her mate to be more loose to start again.

Soon, her lips came back to her lover’s rod, caressing the length. She knew it would make Peridot totally forget the strange sensation invading her lower part, enough to build up the pleasure there too at least. As she expected, Peridot’s hands flew into her hair, gripping it while she trembled heavily. The tentacle hardened under her lips, while her walls lost their grip on her finger. Letting a victorious smile on her lips, she started to slowly move the finger inside her mate, making Peridot grunt.

At the same time, Lapis couldn’t help herself. Feeling the dark green appendage throb so forcefully against her lips, it made her want even more of her lover. She let her tongue wander on the shaft greedily, licking it clean, even if more of the green goo was pumped outside from the extremity. Moaning loudly, the younger gem arched under her, trying to get even more of the delicious pleasure that started to come from both of her sensitive parts. Peridot calls Lapis’ name softly, over and over.

An electric feeling went through Lapis' body when she heard her mate call her like this. Knowing that Peridot enjoyed what she was doing to her. She was wetter seconds after seconds, and it was easier for the blue gem to penetrate her, her solo digit being joined by a second one. She had no problems fitting the two of them inside the donor gem, especially when she started to lick her member extremity at the same time, her lips going around it, sucking softly.

Her fingers searched for the sensitive bundle of nerves inside her lover which was linked to her tentacle. She knew it always did wonders on Peridot when she hit that place. When she felt Peridot tense under her, her small legs starting to shake, and whimpers leave more often, she knew she found it.

She prodded the sensitive area, moaning when she felt even more of the pre cum pour out from her partner’s girth into her mouth. Yet, she was stopped when she felt a harsh pull on her hair, Peridot hips bucking under her, making even more of the tentacle go inside her mouth, surprising her.

“L-Lapis! I’m-I’m gonnAAa ah . . .” Peridot cried, tears forming in the corner of her closed eyes from the pleasure. Her toes curled as she arched under her mate, feeling as if she was ready to explode again.

Yet, abruptly after this, she felt nothing at all. Lapis separated her mouth from her hard and twitchy tentacle, and pulled out her fingers from this. At this, Peridot cried more, trying to buck her hips under her for some friction, in hope to finally get the sweet release she desperately needed. Still, her lover gave her nothing of it. She dared to open an eye to look at her mate, huffing and trying to regain control of her breathing.

Lapis was still kneeling in front her, between her legs, the same intense glare as before locked on her. Her cheeks being a royal blue while her hands placed on Peridot’s hips.

“I want to make you feel even better,” she declared thickly, her voice husky. Soon, her hips joined Peridot’s, and it’s when the smaller gem felt something cold thrusting against her entrance and member that she understood what her mate meant.

A tentacle-like water tendril was proudly erected, coming from between Lapis’ legs. The water gem blushed furiously when she felt Peridot staring at it. She could have shapeshifted a tentacle, but she wouldn’t have been able to recreate the sensitive flesh. Water bending was so much more natural for her to control. She could do it without even thinking about it. A part of the water shape being already hidden inside her, making her tremble at the feeling of the alive liquid moving inside her. She was used to it though. It wasn’t the first time she used her power on herself like this, but it would be the first that she shared it with someone else.

“Oh stars . . .” Peridot breathed, biting her lower lip.

She feels herself clench around nothing at seeing the water tentacle against her like this. She visibly gulped, a bit tense, worrying about if the large and long shape would fit inside her. Yet, she yearned for it. She would have never thought that they could switch positions like this, but it was a pleasant surprise. She wanted to taste more of this new sensation, and she couldn’t think of a better way than being filled by her lover in return.

The younger gem let out a small hiccup of surprise when she felt Lapis press her hips against her own, but it was soon replaced by a warm moan, her arms going around her mate’s shape. Her breath was ragged and she felt her tentacle, still hard and throbbing, pressed between their bodies, Lapis’ water tentacle still pressing against her entrance without doing anything else. Waiting for Peridot’s approval. The smaller gem growled lowly, her cheeks burning. She bucked against her lover, hoping it would make her understand, a tiny “please” escaping from her lips.

As eager as she was, her blue lover didn’t make her wait longer, separating their bodies for just a few seconds. Just the time to align herself and start to slowly penetrate her. The water changes its shape and directly adapts to Peridot’s insides as Lapis refuses to hurt her. Yet, Peridot tensed a bit in her arms, squeaking lowly.

“It’s cold!” Peridot yelped.

Lapis just responded with a small chuckle, mouthing a “sorry” against her lips before kissing her fervently, making the younger gem melt in her arms, finally getting used to the cool water and nearly forgetting it when she responded with vigor to the passionate kiss. Sharp teeth bite the ocean gem’s lower lip when she started to slowly move inside her, a pleasured whine escaping from Peridot.

Ending the kiss and licking her bruised lip, Lapis sits up straight between her lover's legs, looking right at her with a satisfied glare while she starts to move her hips in rhythm against her precious mate. The water rod moves slowly inside and out of her. She couldn’t help herself but look at it, and at how Peridot squirmed under her in pleasure. She enjoyed every second of it. She was making Peridot hers, a thing that only a few donor gems accepted from carriers, and her mate enjoyed it greatly. And oh stars, she loved seeing Peridot so helpless, letting waves of pleasure rush over her like this, and expressing herself so freely, grunts and moans escaping without worry.

Lapis couldn’t help it. She started to move a bit faster inside her, a smile spreading on her lips when the younger gem let her head fall back, keeping her mouth open to let all her sounds of pleasure reach Lapis’ ears. Burying the water tendril to the hilt inside her mate--her small tentacle joining it--she whined, biting her lips before letting out words that burned her tongue.

“Do you like feeling me inside you like this, Peri?” she breathed with a raspy voice full of desire, clearly wanting to hear this from her lover's mouth. At the question, her hips started to slow down a bit, clearly stating that she wouldn’t give her what she wanted if she hadn’t a response. “Tell me . . . .”

She pressed a bit more, her hips still, and her hands going to her mate's to prevent her from continuing to buck against her. She was delighted to see the wriggling tentacle stop its movement in research of friction, hardening and going taut, clearly showing what effect her words had on her poor lover.

“By the Diamonds, YES Lapis! I like it! I-I love it! Please just take me now!” Peridot blurted, pleading, if Lapis denied her pleasure one more time, she would go crazy. She needed to feel more of her mate. So much more. She was embarrassed by all of it, but she didn’t have time to show it, or even think about it. Lapis was just so good.

“You’re such a good gem,” Lapis purred with a satisfied and proud smile, caressing Peridot’s hair. leaving a hot kiss against the burning gem embedded on her partner's forehead. Peridot responded with a whine, starting to get impatient, the praise just feeding the fire in her lower belly.

She didn’t have to beg for more. Lapis was suddenly roaming in her, making her arch, her chest meeting the two blue soft mounts of her lover's body while her tentacle was pressed again between their stomach. The water in her started to swell more, filling her as much as possible while Lapis continued to move inside her. She sees near white behind her eyelids.

What was even more exciting was to hear Lapis herself grunt and moan above her, her own face contorted in an expression full of pleasure as she totally lost herself against her. She didn’t expect that there was more to come though. Her whole body jerked violently when she felt the warm water inside her suddenly move and throb slightly, a fast stream going through the water shape inside herself and inside Lapis. The two of them moaned at the same time, and at this, her blue lover met her lips all over again.

The kiss was sloppy and messy, both way too enraptured in the moment and the sensations to really care. Even more drool rolls down Peridot’s chin, her eyes watering at the intense pleasure building in her.

She was about to let it all go all over again, her tentacle rubbed between their bodies burning fiercely begging for release, while her walls started to throb painfully against the water tentacle. A sob escapes her mouth, and she suddenly trembled violently in Lapis' hold, her hands going directly on her gem, raking her nails on it. At this, Lapis moaned loudly, burying herself in her mate, feeling her own walls squeeze the water tendril violently just after throbbing madly against it. Her small appendage pours out neon blue cum, soiling the water she used on her mate further.

It was way too much for Peridot and after hearing Lapis cum, she arched suddenly under her. Her tentacle shoots warm green fluid between their bodies, even more sobs escaping, while hot tears of pleasure roll down her cheeks. Even several minutes after, she wasn’t able to calm down. Even when Lapis made the water disappear; even when her tentacle softened and retracted in her sheath; and even when her mate rocked her slowly in her arms; caressing her; she was still trembling and crying. She was overwhelmed by the intense pleasure she felt. Lapis could understand, her own eyes watering, but it was due to all the emotions she felt right now. All the love she had for Peridot, raw and powerful. She was totally lost in the tender moment, feeling so close to her lover right now. She wasn’t able to restrain herself.

So they stayed like that for a moment as Peridot started to calm down slowly, her face buried in her partner’s chest, her body limp against Lapis'. She knew that Peridot wasn’t falling asleep. The green gem only indulged into sleep to accompany her and have a soft moment with her, otherwise she refused to lose her time due to some shut eye she didn’t need.

Lapis was, for her part, drifting off to sleep, but stayed awake just to lift Peridot and make her lay on their couch. With just a flick of her wrist, water washed quickly over them to wash them of every trace of their shared intimacy. Leaving them dry and clean, even if she refused to phase back her clothes. Peridot didn’t want to either.

She lays on her green mate, cautious not to crush her. She soon cuddles with her, pressing against her softly. Relieving into the intimacy of the moment, her lips go right to Peridot’s gemstone, grazing it softly. Peridot’s hands goes to the gem between Lapis’ shoulder blades, caressing it with the tips of her fingers

Their gems were sensitive parts of them, but it wasn’t sexual: rather just enjoyable to feel each other like this, trusting the other to let them touch the most precious part of their hard-light form. It was just pure affection, and it was more often than not that they would end up like this.

Then Peridot's voice broke down the peaceful silence they were enjoying. Her voice soft and low, with a light gravely tone underneath.

“You know what Lapis? We both want to fuse together. But I can wait. It can wait. Until you feel ready. No need to pressure yourself into it. I want our first to be an amazing experience for you, and to make you forget about the bad one,” Peridot breathed warmly, letting her whole palm caress Lapis’ gemstone.

Lapis didn’t understand how such a perfect, caring and sweet gem could be hers. She clearly didn’t deserve her--she was just so precious. And yet, she was so happy right now. Emotions washed over her, while she shakily kissed her mate's lips. Not able to respond properly, her throat too tight for it due to all the feeling taking over. She just hopes she would be able to show how grateful she was through the small exchange.

Yet, Peridot wasn’t finished talking and reassuring her. Her other hand was in Lapis midnight blue hair, while the other was still on her gemstone.

“I just hope that Era 2 Peridots are able to fuse. You don’t know how much I wish for it to be possible. I want to share everything I can with you. Everything. You just need to trust yourself again, Lapis, and I’ll be there to help you through it,” she continued softly, feeling a wet sensation on her collarbones, where Lapis face was pressed.

“And if we ever need to feel close to each other, to feel loved or to show our affection, we can still mate together like this.” She finishes by kissing her mate's beautiful hair. Letting her cry against her and let everything out.

Lapis just hugged her even closer, pressing her face into her collarbones, refusing to let sobs leave her lips, but not being able to restrain them, when she finally forced herself to let broken words leave her tight throat.

“I love you. I love you so much. I will never leave you or hurt you again, Peridot. And I’ll be better, I’ll be able to fuse with you one day, I promise,” she sobbed, her body still shaking against her lover. Unable to restrain all the emotion flooding her heart.

“I know, Lapis . . . I know. I love you too,” Peridot whispered, and they stayed like that for a while--against each other--losing themselves into the sweetness of this moment.

Lapis finally calmed down, and let herself fall asleep, reassured to be so close to her mate. Peridot finally follows after her, just enjoying being cuddled by her lover, her hands cupping the round shape of her gem, still warm and glowing softly after everything.

Maybe they didn’t know what was awaiting them, or what would happen in the future. But one thing was certain: they would be strong and stay together. Even if they weren’t ready to fuse together right now, it didn’t mean any less of their feelings for each other. On the contrary. It was the purest form of love coming from Peridot; supporting Lapis and waiting for her until she felt ready. She would be proud to claim this to the next gem asking them if they already fused together or not because if fusion was a way to show trust and feelings, patience and support was a way to show their love. 

And this was the only exception; the only thing that would last.


End file.
